“To shine your brightest light is to be who you truly are.”
― Roy T. Bennett

How often do you stop and think about all that you are?

I think it’s a pretty common trait to think about all the things that you aren’t. We berate ourselves because we’re not better at math or finance, we chide ourselves because we’re not as committed as we want to be at losing weight, we go directly to self-criticism because we’re not better at a sport, or at cooking, or at art. Stop and ask how important what you’re beating yourself up over really is.

When we focus on what we lack, we overlook all that we are: all the skills and experience we’ve acquired, how much we mean to our friends and family, what we contribute at work and in the community. That “I am not” focus is a glass half-empty perspective to which many of us fall victim, myself included.

So how do you control that impulse? You might try writing down all that you’ve achieved, all the people who love and care for you, and all you contribute to various parts of your life. Writing it down helps as a visual reminder,  and you can return to it when you need a boost. If you are spiritual or religious in nature, taking an “attitude of gratitude” and making a regular discipline of expressing gratitude, focusing on different personal gifts each time works well for many. Another idea is to ask friends or family to share with you what some of their favorite aspects are of your personality. Be sure to take notes!

If you find there’s some skill or quality you don’t have and that’s really important to you to attain, don’t overlook that you have the power to learn it. And it doesn’t have to break the bank to do so! There’s never been a better time to learn new things, between free or low price online classes (Youtube offers a wealth of possibilities), the library where you can borrow books and videos, and community groups that offer specialized training.

As we jump into the month of November, a month known for gratitude and thankfulness, I invite all of us to embrace, celebrate, and share all that we are! There is rich reward and power in that knowledge, confidence and action.

Originally published in BeyondtheNest.com, Rochester’s FREE weekly guide to Arts, Culture and Recreation.